We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
