shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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