I faked an abortion last night.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Randomize
