just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
