He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
