i just wanna soil my oats bro
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
