i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
