just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
