i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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