And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize