It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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