A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
my poor anus
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize