mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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