Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Randomize
