Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Randomize
