oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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