I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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