READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
