just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
