I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
