Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
You pole danced in your parka.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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