i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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