How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
