school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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