I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize