My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize