Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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