3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Randomize
