so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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