so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
It's blow job season.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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