Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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