Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
