A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
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