DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize