My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize