Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
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