You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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