pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize