This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
