I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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