What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
