we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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