idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
