goodnight i made you a song goodbye
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
