I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Randomize
