im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize