So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
drinking out of a sandbucket again
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
