I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
porn star boner night. come get it.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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