What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
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