dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
