The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
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