You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I know her cup size but not her name....
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